Girls' Night Out PerfectionStyle
by ShadoeKylie
Summary: Finally, the Perfection girls get a break away from the guys!
1. Default Chapter

**Girls' Night Out - Perfection-Style**  
**by Shadoe Masters**

This is Story 8 of "The Great Burt Baiting Saga." These stories center on the characters from Tremors: The Series, and feature Burt, Tyler, and all the gang from Perfection Valley. There are also original characters of my own creation - just so you're warned ahead of time. But please don't let that scare you off. I hope you enjoy them. 

While this story is a romance, the people involved are not the most cooperative people in the coupling department. The romantic elements take time to unfold. 

Feedback: Please let me know what you think of each story. I love feedback, both good and bad, and the more detailed the better. 

Disclaimer: "Tremors" is not owned by me or my affiliates, but by Stampede Entertainment, Universal Studios, and their affiliates. No copyright infringement is intended - just some good, clean (well, mostly) fun! 

E-mail: 

Thanks to my beta readers: LadyNRA & the gang at work

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**Girls' Night Out - Perfection-Style**  
**by Shadoe Masters**

Perfection, Nevada, 8/11/2003 

It was late when Burt and Tyler returned from Utah, where they'd gone to pick up Burt's new water filtration system. They'd stopped at Burt's place to unload, which added another hour to the day-long trip. Both men were tired and more than ready to see the last of Burt's truck. They were also very aware they had another long drive in store for them in the morning. 

"We'll need to leave by 0430 hours," Burt decided after they'd spent the ride from Burt's compound discussing distances, weather, and road conditions. "That'll get you up to your family reunion by 0800 hours, and I'll be able to reach the match by..." His voice trailed off at the strange sight that met his eyes as the power wagon entered the darkened town of Perfection. "What the hell?" 

A small bonfire burned midway between Chang's and the local water tower, and they heard music playing from the darkness as the power wagon pulled up in front of Chang's. The men got out of the truck and stood watching a moment, identically perplexed expressions on their faces. 

"Got me, Burt," Tyler offered at last, pushing the blue 51's hat back on his head. 

At the edge of the light from the fire, Nancy and Jodi reclined on a blanket spread on the ground, wearing bathing suits and sipping umbrella-covered drinks. Both wore sunglasses. 

After exchanging a wary glance, the two men walked over to the blanket. 

"What's going on, girls?" Tyler asked, a bemused smile on his face. 

"We're having a beach party," Jodi supplied with the lazy grin of the slightly tipsy. 

Tyler gave her an answering grin as he noticed she didn't look half bad in a bathing suit. 

"'Beach party'?" Burt repeated, incredulous. He looked around, and sure enough, dancing just out of the light of the fire was Kylie, wearing nothing more than what looked like a series of yellow strings in the configuration of a bikini. 

"Yes, a beach party," Nancy confirmed, with a smile to match Jodi's. 

Burt dragged his attention away from Kylie, who was, slowly, in time with the music, approaching them. "May I point out," he said, with infinite patience, "that we are in the middle of the desert and there's no beach nearby?" 

"Oh no, Burt, you're wrong," Jodi said earnestly. "It's right over there." She waved her free hand vaguely in the direction of the hills behind the store. 

Burt and Tyler obligingly looked, then shared another bemused glance. 

"They're nuts," Burt pronounced. He turned back to the pair on the blanket. "Do you know how dangerous this is? El Blanco could--" 

Nancy interrupted him. "El Blanco is on the other side of the valley, Burt." She and Jodi held up their wrist seismos. Then Nancy pointed to the building. The seismo monitor unit had been propped in the window, facing out. "We thought of that." 

Burt opened his mouth to reply but the music's volume went up as Kylie reached the CD player set up on a table near the store. "Less talk, more dancing!" she giggled and took Tyler's hand. Placing his hand on her waist and one of hers on his shoulder, she swung away with him. 

Tyler didn't seem to mind. He pulled her a little closer and smiled as she fed him a sip of her drink. 

Burt stood and fumed at the pair, trying not to notice the gentle rise and fall of Kylie's backside as her hips swayed from side to side. "May I remind you--" he started, turning back to the pair on the blanket. 

"Oh, stop being a fuddy-duddy, Burt," Nancy interrupted, in a cajoling tone. "We're just trying to have a little fun. With the tour jeep down and the phone lines out, it's been pretty boring around here this week." 

He crossed his arms and looked down his nose at the whole group. 

Tyler and Kylie danced back into the light of the fire and Kylie spun away from Tyler toward Burt. She slid one hand up his arm to rest on his shoulder and smiled up at him. "Dance with me, Burt," she coaxed. 

He felt his arms moving toward her before he knew what they were doing, and promptly slammed his hands down on his hips. 

Kylie just shook her head with a smile at his stubbornness and handed her drink to Tyler so she could take his hands. She laced her fingers through his on his left, and settled his other hand on her waist. Still smiling up at him, she spun him in a slow, lazy circle, while singing along to the tune "Under the Boardwalk" coming from the boom box. 

Burt could feel every shift of her body from the one hand resting on the velvety soft skin on her hip. It's warmth swayed and slid under his hand, bringing him to instant and complete arousal. She smelled like spring soaked in alcohol and Burt inhaled greedily. Even her fingers, cool and small entwined with his, conspired to force long suppressed sensations on him. He was sinking, and couldn't think of a way to save himself. Then he felt her breasts brush against him. Just a brief touch, but his skin burned and the shockwaves vibrated through him from head to toe. He felt his hand slip a little further around her waist and stopped himself. "You are drunk," he pronounced, his voice rough. 

"Yes, I am," she said with an unrepentant smile and slightly glassy eyes. "Nancy made mai-tais." 

His eyes slid downward from her smile and his body reminded him that he liked that view all too much. He brought his chin up to stare off into the darkness over her head. "You shouldn't drink," he mumbled. "You can't handle liquor." 

"I can handle it fine," she said. "I just get drunk." She giggled again and pressed her body against his, sliding her arm around his back to cuddle into his embrace. 

Burt groaned. He could feel every soft, supple curve of her pressed against him. She felt so good, so right, so-- 

He stumbled back away from her, then grabbed her shoulders when she would have fallen. "You need to go sleep it off!" he commanded, letting her go as soon as she steadied. He spun and stalked away, pausing only long enough to glare at Nancy as he walked by and tell her, "_You_ should know better." 

He got in his truck, started it, and backed out, but stopped. "Tyler, 0430 hours. Don't forget." 

The younger man had already pulled off his shirt and was dancing with Jodi. He nodded and waved a hand vaguely in Burt's direction. "I'll be ready." 

Kylie walked slowly toward the truck, her hips swaying and that bikini she wore, leaving little to the imagination. His mind told him he only needed to release the brake to leave. But he didn't. 

"C'mon Burt," she said in a plaintive voice. "We need guys to dance with. You can--" 

"I'll be in town at 0400," he said firmly, concentrating on a tuft of hair at the top of her head. "I have some last minute instructions for you, so you need to be awake." 

She stopped, one hand on her hip, and sighed. "Burt Gummer, you have no sense of fun." 

"No, I do not," he adamantly confirmed, forcing himself to drive away. 

Watching her disappear in the rear view mirror, he nearly hit the gas pump as he drove away. 

Burt checked his watch one more time and glared at the darkened house across the street from Chang's Market. "0422 hours," he muttered under his breath. 

The light in Tyler's garage had flickered to life as Burt pulled up in front of the store at 0355, indicating he was, at least, awake. Thus far, Kylie hadn't appeared. He saw no lights from Nancy's and Kylie was, in all likelihood, still asleep. He heaved a sigh. He'd have to wake her up. Couldn't the woman be on time for something at least once? 

He stomped across the street and climbed the stairs to Nancy's side porch. He knew Kylie's room was the one off the kitchen, so he'd try there first. He banged on the door and waited. Then banged again, louder, when there was no response. He sighed and shook his head. The four of them had probably spent the night drinking. He was surprised they weren't still at it when he arrived. 

He tried the door. The knob twisted easily under his hand. Shaking his head, he muttered, "...simple security precautions..." under his breath. 

He couldn't see much without a light, but he'd spent enough time in Nancy's kitchen to know where everything was. He passed the small table at the window to his left and looked into Kylie's darkened room on the right, just past the laundry room. Sure enough, there were no lights or signs of activity, and there was no light from under the bathroom door across the room. He pulled out his mag-lite and aimed the beam into the room just long enough to ascertain that she was on the bed. The image of her nude body sprawled facedown amid the rumpled sheets and pillows burned onto his retinas. At least she'd had a sheet thrown mostly over her backside. 

"Kylie," he hissed. No response. He couldn't just go in and wake her, not dressed - or, rather, undressed - as she was. She didn't have a thing on. It wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be decent. What if he stepped into the room and Nancy showed up? Kylie, of course, would see nothing wrong and probably would just traipse around the room like that. Still, he couldn't go in there. He called her name again, louder. She didn't stir. He sighed. 

He was going to have to go in there. 

Aiming the mag-lite toward his feet, he stepped into the room and walked toward the bed, careful to avoid the haphazard jumble of clothes, shoes, and other items strewn at random across the floor. Inevitably, he tripped over some unidentified object she'd left on the floor that the mag-lite's narrow beam had failed to reveal. Cursing under his breath, he caught himself, one hand on the edge of the bed, one on the dresser nearby. As he levered himself back to his feet and kicked a box out of his way, he told himself to just be thankful he hadn't landed on the bed. 

"Kylie," he hissed again, with similar results. She slept like the dead. 

By then his eyes had adjusted to the darkness, and with the moonlight spilling in through the uncovered window, he could just make out where she was on the bed. He turned the mag-lite off and slipped it back in his pocket, then leaned over to shake her shoulder. First, though, he pulled a corner of the sheet over her from the jumbled pile wadded nearest him. Decency accomplished, he leaned toward her. He quickly realized, however, that he couldn't quite reach her without overbalancing. He debated shaking her leg instead but decided against that after allowing himself a slight, though guilty, grin. He rested one fist on the bed, for balance, and reached out to shake her shoulder. "Kylie," he whispered. 

She murmured a soft protest but didn't wake, so he shook her a little more firmly, saying her name louder. 

"Wha--" She got out, as, suddenly, she spun, taking the sheet with her and yanking it out from under Burt's hand. He overbalanced and slid, then collapsed. She screamed as Burt landed across her legs. 

He was yelling almost before he landed. "Dammit Kylie! Would you just--" Almost levitating, he scrambled away from her, even as she clambered out from under him. He found himself kneeling next to the bed, staring at the outline of her nude body in the moonlight. "Dammit Kylie!" he repeated, throwing a sheet at her. 

Light flooded the room suddenly and Burt spun, his hand going to his holster. 

Nancy stood in the doorway in a thin nightgown holding a baseball bat at the ready, her eyes red and hair rumpled, and a shocked expression on her face. She stared, blinking, from Burt on the floor to Kylie, half-covered on the bed. "What is going on here?" 

Burt shot to this feet with only a glare for both of them and gathered his tattered dignity around him. He soundlessly left the room. "I'll meet you at Chang's," he finally shouted when he reached the porch. "And put some clothes on!" 

Nancy still stood, frozen and blinking, in the door to the bathroom, which connected their two rooms. "_What_ are you two up to?" 

Kylie shook her head, still trying to process what had happened. "I, uh, think I overslept." 

Nancy just shook her head and went back to bed. 


	2. Part 2

**Girls' Night Out - Perfection-Style**  
**by Shadoe Masters**

Kylie sat huddled around a cup of hot coffee on the front porch at Chang's, wishing she was still in bed. She'd folded her knees up to her chest and wrapped the light robe she wore around her legs and wondered if she could somehow wrap the thing around her head and go back to sleep. 

The door next to her slammed suddenly and she jumped, sloshing hot coffee over her hands and very nearly falling off the bench. She glared at Burt, shaking the coffee off her hand. "You did that on purpose," she accused. 

He didn't answer, but returned her stare, his brows knitted. 

Slowly, she unfolded her legs and stretched them out in front of her, not bothering to pull the robe over them. The cloth spread open, displaying a line of flesh that was almost, but not quite, indecent. 

Burt's jaw hardened and he looked away, but said nothing. Instead, he went to the truck and started slamming supplies and guns around on the back. 

Between the effort it was taking to look casual and the pain Burt's "arranging" was causing to her head, Kylie decided she was too tired to win this round. Yawning, she pulled her robe over her legs then took another sip of coffee. "I thought Tyler was going with you," she said. 

Burt slammed another pack into the back of his truck and shot her That Look of his. 

Kylie did her tired best to level that look right back at him. 

"He is, but apparently," Burt replied at last, in his superior tone, "he overslept because _someone_ kept him up half the night." 

Kylie grinned at him. "You're just mad because you didn't get to go to the beach too." 

"There is no--" he began, but realized by the twinkle in her eyes that Kylie was just trying to aggravate him and dropped that line. "At least he was awake," he pointed out victoriously. 

"I forgot to set the alarm," Kylie muttered. 

"If you'd gotten one of those watches I told you to--" 

"I'm not going to sleep with a watch on, Burt! If you'd just--" 

"You two need a time out?" Tyler asked as he stepped onto the porch and grinned at the pair of them. 

Burt shot Kylie a resentful look and went back to slamming things around in the truck. Kylie just rolled her eyes at Tyler and shrugged. They both knew there was no pacifying Burt when he was in one of his moods. 

Tyler glanced over at Kylie while he put his bag in the back of the truck. "Nice outfit." 

"Thank you," she simpered, prompting another glare from Burt. 

"You put some coffee on?" Tyler said, shifting his attention to Burt. 

Burt nodded silently. 

Tyler paused long enough to shake an admonishing finger at Kylie while Burt wasn't looking, then went inside in search of caffeine. 

Burt stopped rearranging the gear and dropped out of the truck. "I thought I told you to put some clothes on." 

Kylie picked at the flimsy robe she wore. "This is clothes." 

Burt snorted. 

"Burt, it's four o'clock in the morning!" Kylie protested. 

"0445," he corrected, after a quick glance at his watch. 

Kylie rolled her eyes. "Whatever. The point is, I should still be in bed. I need my beauty sleep." 

"If you hadn't been indulging in your... beach _fantasy_ last night, we could have covered this then." He pulled a piece of equipment almost a foot long out of the truck's front seat and sat down next to her. "You know I need you to test the SDS while I'm gone." He started pointing out switches and dials. "This is the--" 

She pulled it out of his hands and set it next to her, away from him. "Burt, I know. I have notes." She took a sip of coffee. "And diagrams, and photos..." she looked up at him, "..._and an animated movie, in case I forget all that_." 

He looked down his nose at her and frowned. "I didn't get the box finished until last night." He started reaching across her for the box and she smacked his hand. 

"I can read my notes, Burt! I'm not an idiot!" To prove to him that she'd been paying attention she quickly ran through the test procedure, with options, until he stopped looking skeptical. "Satisfied?" 

He sort of nodded while shaking his head, as if it pained him to admit she got it right. He pulled a sheet of paper out of his vest pocket. "I made a list--" 

She snatched the list out of his hand and scanned it, then jammed it in the pocket of her robe. "I know what I'm supposed to do while you're gone, Burt. You've been over this a dozen times in the past week." 

Burt shook his head. "I don't like leaving you women alone while both Tyler and I are gone. Harlow won't be out until Wednesday, you know, and even Twitchell has that conference in San Diego this week." 

"Larry will be back tomorrow," Kylie pointed out. 

Burt leveled That Look at her again. 

Kylie sighed impatiently. "The wimminfolk will be _fine_ Burt. I have a gun, you know." She took pity on him because he did look genuinely worried and patted his knee reassuringly while smiling up at him. "And I know how to shoot it, thanks to you." 

He looked away. "I could wait until next week's event, then Tyler will be here..." 

"No," Kylie said firmly, setting down her coffee and waking up somewhat, "because when you get back you have survival school, then we have to go calibrate the geophone system, and after that we have to test out the new ABDS. _And_ you wanted to get that new whatsit installed after that or you're not going to be happy, and you know I'm going to get my hair done after that. Now is the best time." He still didn't look happy. She put her hands on his shoulders. "Burt, we'll be _fine_." 

"You'll have to check my equipment while I'm gone," he said reluctantly. "There's the new satellite linkup in my bunker you'll need to set up each day." He looked away. "It'll be a good test of the system. I'll have the handheld unit..." He couldn't believe he was deliberately allowing her to run rampant in his bunker while he was gone. He tried to think of anything... sensitive he might have failed to lock up... 

"I _know_, Burt." She patted Burt's note in her side pocket. "And I have lists to remind me. So stop worrying, we'll be fine." She drank some more coffee. "Not like this is rocket surgery or anything." 

Burt stared at her. "What? Rocket--" He shook his head, refusing to rise to the bait this time. "This is all very delicate, complicated equipment! If you--" 

She patted his cheek with a grin. "And you've built it so well even a child could understand it, Burt," she told him. "I'll be fine." 

He _had_ built it well, that much was true. He worked his mouth around a bit, trying to think of anything he'd forgotten. "Just... don't forget the ABDS," he grumbled at last. "It won't be easy with one person. You'll need to--" 

"I'm taking Nancy with me for that," Kylie said. "She can--" 

"_Nancy_? Are you _insane_?" 

"She can hold the monitor just once, Burt. It'll be fine. I'll keep an eye on her." She patted his knee. "I'm not going to let her break your toys." 

Burt opened his mouth to argue with that, but Tyler stepped out onto the porch with a smirk on his face. 

As the door swung shut behind him, Jodi caught it and stepped out. Her hair was a mess and she wore a robe over her pajamas. She didn't look happy. 

"What are you doing awake?" Tyler asked. 

"Who could sleep with all this going on?" Jodi grumbled, gesturing at Burt and Kylie as she shot them a resentful look. 

Tyler's smirk came back. "They do go on, don't they?" 

Jodi looked at the watch she had in her hand. "I thought you two were supposed to be gone by now." 

Tyler snorted, pointing out the two still bickering with his chin. 

Jodi shook her head and went back inside. 

Kylie bent to set her cup on the porch and stood up and put her hands on her hips. "We'll be _fine_, Burt! Aren't you gone yet?" 

"Remember," he said, also standing. "The valley phone lines are still being repaired, so you're out of communication at least until Wednesday. I don't like leaving you with no way to contact me." 

"Burt, you've got a satellite linkup at your bunker. If we're in any danger, we can call for help through that. And Harlow's going to be in the valley, so us wimminfolk won't be entirely unprotected by a big strong man. We'll get by." 

"Tyler could take my truck, he'll be back--" 

"No! We need a vacation. We have to do girl stuff - facials, hair treatments, painting our nails... _stuff_. You've got to _go_." Kylie started pushing him toward the truck, shooting Tyler a glance for help. 

Jodi came out a thermos of coffee for each of them and a bag of sandwiches. She thrust them at Tyler with an angry glare. 

He took the thermoses, the bag, and the hint, and got in the truck. "Let's go, Burt!" he said. 

Kylie shut Burt's door and stood back, a bright, confident smile on her face. "Bye! Have a good time! Win lots of trophies!" As Burt started up the truck and put it into gear, she stepped back to the porch and picked up the box he'd given her and started examining it, absently waving with her free hand. "Much work to do. Bu-bye now!" 

Until Burt's truck rounded the corner. 

"_Ugh_!" She set the box back on the bench and started across the street. 

"Where you going?" Jodi asked. 

"...nap..." Kylie replied over a yawn. 


	3. Part 3

**Girls' Night Out - Perfection-Style**  
**by Shadoe Masters**

Jodi filled a cup of coffee and joined Nancy on the front porch. As she settled beside her on the bench, she asked, "Aren't you two supposed to be out checking some of Burt's mysterious equipment?" 

"Kylie just got up." Nancy smiled. "Burt's been running her ragged this week, getting ready for his trip, so she's taking it easy today." She took another sip of cappuccino and sighed. "As soon as she's done taking her shower, we'll go wandering around in the desert." 

The two women shared a laugh. 

From across the street, they heard the sound of breaking glass, followed quickly by a scream. 

"What--" Nancy jumped up and was already halfway across the street when Kylie burst out of her side porch. 

She wore nothing more than a pair of jeans and a light blue bra, and in her hands held the two katanas from the display atop her dresser. She used them to hack and slash at a creature that followed her out the door. 

The thing looked like some kind of giant beetle; about waist high, with six furry legs and a brown leather-like carapace on top. There was a set of pincers jutting out from where the head should be and it nipped at Kylie each time it darted toward her. 

The swords, razor-sharp as they were, had little effect on the pincers or the tough upper shell. The best she could do was keep it away from her by thrusting between the pincers with the longer sword while she backed toward the store and away from the oncoming animal. 

While Nancy watched in horror, two more of the creatures appeared from behind the house. She thought she saw more coming down the hill toward town. 

She spun to Jodi. "Get your gun!" 

Jodi ran inside and Nancy agonized over how to help. "Its legs!" she shouted at last. "Go for the legs!" 

Kylie jabbed twice more and sidestepped, then spun and slashed downward with the long sword with all her strength. The katana sliced through the beetle's first two legs and it toppled toward her. She leaped back out of its way and parried a thrust from another one of the creatures while Nancy waved her arms and shouted, trying to keep the disabled one distracted. 

Jodi burst out the door with the snub nosed revolver Tyler insisted she keep in a drawer by the cash register. She held it as Tyler showed her, both hands together but still shaking, and aimed, squeezing one eye shut. 

Out of the corner of her eye, Kylie saw Jodi take aim in her direction. Her eyes widened and she took one last swipe at the creature as she dived out of the way. 

Just in time. The bullet from Jodi's gun hit the dirt where she'd been standing. 

The animal Jodi had missed saw his chance with Kylie on the ground and darted toward her. 

Kylie rolled out of the way with one last slash with her shoto, the short sword. The longer sword in her right hand, the daito, she used to fend off another that was coming toward her from a different direction. She rolled to her feet and tried to back toward the store, but another of the pincered beetles was circling around behind her. 

Nancy ran around to the side, attracting the creature's attention, and Kylie took the opportunity to thrust the daito into the vulnerable underside, splitting the creature open, spilling blood and entrails onto the ground. 

Jodi fired again, narrowly missing Nancy this time, which attracted the older woman's attention. She backed away from the creatures and ran toward the porch. 

Kylie ducked another of Jodi's shots and slashed the legs out from another of the animals, fending a second one off with the shoto. "This isn't working," she muttered, wishing she had her Kimber. Locked up in the safe in her truck behind Nancy's house, it wasn't doing her a bit of good. She was surrounded. One on each side, and another in front of her. If she could just get around them to the store... 

As Nancy reached the porch, in desperation, she took the gun from Jodi and aimed. Her first shot missed, but the second punctured the tough shell on the one advancing on Kylie. 

Kylie took advantage of Nancy's shot and ran forward, hurdling the downed monster, and narrowly escaping the two that came from either side. It wasn't a permanent escape, though - they followed, too quickly. 

Nancy sidestepped Kylie's approach and aimed again, shooting one of the beetles following the younger woman. She was taking aim at the other when Kylie reached her. 

Kylie switched the daito to her left hand and took the gun from Nancy. She planted her feet and sighted the revolver straight down her arm, just as Burt taught her, and fired. The shot caught the creature right between its pincers and it flipped, slamming into another one of the creatures following it. This caused some momentary confusion on the part of the other monsters, as they paused to investigate their dead comrade. 

The three women turned as one to run into the store, but they'd strayed too far from the door. One of the beetles advanced toward them from the other end of the porch. They'd never make the door in time. 

"Oh no!" Jodi shouted. 

"The back door!" Nancy shouted. The women spun and ran around the building, but there were more of them milling around back there. They skidded to a halt and turned, searching for cover. 

"We'll never make the house," Nancy said. "Too many of them." 

"Tyler's garage!" Kylie shouted, already running for the street. 

The other women followed and they made it to the building, a trail of the monsters running after, their pincers clicking angrily away. 

Kylie went to the main door, but Jodi shouted, "The side door - he never locks that one!" Jodi reached it first and then Nancy and Kylie flew through it. They slammed it just as the animals caught up. 

The three women leaned against the door, chests heaving from the run, hoping the creatures would lose interest and go away. 

They thumped against the door a few times while the women held it shut. Nancy ran to the desk behind them and grabbed a screwdriver to wedge the door shut. One pincer pried itself under the door until Kylie stabbed the shoto into it. The women listened as the beetles banged into the door and surrounding walls, then finally faded away. 

Kylie darted to the window. 

"Are they still there?" Nancy asked. 

Kylie nodded. "They don't look like they're going to try to dig their way in, though." 

Nancy joined her at the window. "What are they doing?" 

"I have no idea..." 

The creatures milled around the town, seemingly lost. A few of them tore into the few beetles the women had managed to kill, but others just wandered aimlessly. 

"What are they?" Jodi asked. 

"Who knows?" Nancy said. "Just another Perfection nightmare." She turned to look out the other window. "No!" she shouted then, prompting Kylie to pull the revolver she'd tucked into the back of her jeans, even before she told herself the empty revolver would do her no good. 

"What?" the younger woman said urgently, joining her at the window. 

"They're tearing up my garden!" Nancy complained. 

Kylie shook her head, unsurprised. "They tore up your house too." 

Nancy looked a question at her. 

"I told you you'd get bugs if you didn't stop leaving that back door open. They were all over inside before I heard them. The place is a mess." 

"Great." Nancy crossed to the radio on Tyler's desk and turned it on. 

Nothing happened. 

"It hasn't worked in weeks," Jodi pointed out. "He keeps meaning to fix it..." 

"Don't tell Burt," Kylie said. "You know how he has fits if someone lets 'essential equipment' break down." 

The women shared a brief smile. They'd all been subject to a Burt speech - many times. 

Nancy picked up the phone. 

"The phones won't be fixed until Tuesday," Jodi reminded her. "At least." 

"I can dream, can't I?" Nancy said. "If we just had some way of getting in touch with Rosalita..." 

"Where are your radios?" Kylie asked, eyeing them suspiciously. 

"At the store," the two replied in unison. 

"What about yours?" Nancy said with a grin. 

Kylie gave her a look, then glanced down at her half-clad body. "I'm lucky I got my jeans on." 

"Burt will never let us hear the end of this," Nancy complained. 

"Burt isn't going to hear about it," Kylie said. She set the two swords on Tyler's desk and started going through the drawers. "We'll take care of... whatever these things are, and have the whole problem cleared up by lunchtime." 

Nancy looked at her watch. "It's almost lunchtime now." 

Kylie shot her a glance. "So we're a little behind schedule." 

"What are we going to do?" 

"We're going to have to kill them," Kylie said. "Which will be no problem, _if Tyler has some bullets in here_..." She dug frantically through another messy drawer and came up empty handed. "Where does he keep his ammo?" 

Jodi shrugged. 

Kylie abandoned the desk and went to the file cabinet, where she achieved a similar lack of success. After slamming the last drawer and rifling through the last pile of papers, she admitted defeat. Kylie put her hands on her hips and scanned the immediate area. "I can't believe Tyler doesn't have any ammunition. What kind of man is he?" 

"He's got a gun in the tour jeep," Jodi suggested. "That should have some bullets." 

"Why don't you just pop out there and get it?" Kylie replied. 

"No, I can wait," Jodi said. 

"We'll help you look," Nancy said, and started going through the nearest shelves. Jodi took the area around Tyler's couch. Kylie went to explore the garage. 

"This place is a _mess_," Jodi complained, pulling a half a dozen beer bottles from behind the couch. 

Nancy glanced over at her. "He's a man living alone." 

"But... yuk!" Jodi pulled a half-filled plate from her lunch counter out from under the couch. It had obviously been there for some time. 

Nancy just shook her head and continued her own search. 

"Nancy, look at this." 

Nancy turned. Jodi held two boxes of the popular brand of condoms. She raised an eyebrow. "He's a heck of an optimist," she commented. 

Jodi rummaged another moment under the couch. "Maybe they go with these." She held up two popular men's magazines. 

Nancy laughed. "I can't believe Tyler reads that trash." 

"I don't think it's here for _reading_," Jodi replied. She flipped through the magazine until the centerfold opened. "Ha!" 

Nancy went to look. Even Kylie came to see what was amusing them. 

"Those can't be real," Nancy said. 

"Why would they even _want_ them that big?" Jodi asked. 

"I think men have a strange attitude toward _size_," Kylie commented. 

Jodi giggled and threw the magazines aside to pull some more things out from under and behind the couch. Dirty clothes, trash, old fast food bags, a lot more beer bottles... Jodi couldn't take it anymore, she started sorting and throwing away. 

"He's going to kill you," Nancy said, arms crossed, as the magazines went in the trash. 

Jodi shrugged. "I can't have this mess around me." 

Nancy just shook her head and went to the next shelf. "Bingo!" she said. She pulled out a box of bullets and held them aloft. 

Kylie hurried over and looked at the box. Her face broke into a smile. "Great! They're the right ones, too!" She took the box and her smile faltered when she found it oddly light. She opened it to find only four bullets inside. "That's it? We search this whole place and find four lousy bullets?" 

"We found some magazines," Nancy offered. 

Kylie slanted a glance at her. "Funny." She slid the few bullets into the revolver and put her hands on her hips, disgusted. "What kind of man is Tyler anyway?" 

"Look," Nancy said. "We're safe in here. We could find a way to signal for help. Maybe Tyler has a flare gun or something." 

Kylie snorted. "He doesn't even keep bullets for his gun. He's hardly prepared enough to keep a flare gun for emergencies." 

"We could signal with something else," Nancy suggested. "Maybe a fire?" 

The three women looked around at the abundant piles of junk scattered everywhere. 

"Could we get a big enough fire?" Jodi asked. "Just about everything is metal." 

Kylie nodded. "We could light some of those tires. The smoke would be visible for miles." 

"Let's do it," Nancy said, already starting for the stack of tires on the other side of the garage. 

"Out back is the best place for it," Kylie said, heading to the back door to the garage. The knob turned, but the door didn't move. She noticed the deadbolt on it, the kind that needed a key from both sides. "Locked! We'll need to get _out_ there to set up the fire, and I don't think going through the front is really a good idea right now." 

Chagrined, they went to the window. 

There were still several of the creatures milling around, seemingly lost. 

"Is it me, or does it seem that there are less of them than there were before?" Jodi asked. 

Kylie nodded. "I think you're right." She pressed her face against the glass, looking right and left. "I don't see any more from this window." She went to the window at the side of the garage. "No more through here, either, but I can't really see through the trailer." She looked around. "Check the others; see if there are any out back." 

The women looked through the grimy windows, most half-blocked by metal shelving or piles of junk, as well as the many rust holes through the walls. They soon came to an agreement. 

"None behind or beside the garage," Nancy said. "But where did they go?" 

Kylie shook her head. "I don't like it, not knowing where they went. They could be anywhere, lurking, waiting to attack." 

Nancy rolled her eyes. "_Or_... they just wandered away." 

"Couldn't we just light one of the tires in here and just... roll it outside?" Jodi suggested. 

The other two women rolled their eyes in her direction. "Assuming," Kylie said, "we did not light ourselves or this gas-soaked, highly flammable building on fire, initially, what would we use to start it rolling once it's on fire?" 

"We'll have to get them outside before we light them," Nancy said to Jodi, who nodded her agreement. 

Kylie put her hands on her hips and sighed. "We're going to need a really big fire if it's going to be seen outside the valley, and unless we want to choke on the black smoke, we'll have to make sure it's downwind, which, right now, is in back of the garage. With that door locked, we'll have to go out the front, which will attract the monsters that are still around, and take us much longer to set up - giving them lots of time to attack us. And we don't have an effective way to protect ourselves while we work on this." 

The two women nodded. 

"Isn't there something in here we could use?" Nancy asked. 

They looked around again, but nothing made itself obvious. 

"I'd do it if I have a few more bullets for this gun," Kylie said. 

"Well we don't," Nancy reminded her. 

"But we _could_," Kylie replied, returning to the front window. 

Nancy followed her, a suspicious frown on her face. "What do you mean?" 

"Look," Kylie said, pointing out the window. "There are a lot less of them now. The few that are still in town are all pretty far away. I could make it to the store in a flash--" 

"Absolutely not!" Nancy said. "It's too far and there are still too many of them." 

"But by the time I got to the store, I'll have plenty of ammunition. I could--" 

"What if they're _in_ the store?" Jodi asked. 

They looked across the street. Chang's front door hung at a crazy angle, indicating that, at least, they'd _been_ in there. If some were still inside was anyone's guess. 

Kylie frowned. "Well... I could still make it to Tyler's Jeep! It can't be more than 15 feet away. That's just a short sprint!" 

Jodi and Nancy exchanged a dubious glance then looked back at Kylie. 

"Well..." Nancy began. 

"Nancy," Kylie said, "There aren't any nearby. I'll just dash out there, grab the gun and any bullets he may have in the glove compartment, and dash right back. Even if they notice I'm out there, which is unlikely, I'll be back in here before any of them have a chance to reach the Jeep." 

Nancy looked out the window as if searching for some reason Kylie was wrong. But the creatures were, as she said, too far away to attack if Kylie was only going as far as the Jeep... 

"All right," She said at last. "But only as far as the tour Jeep." 

Kylie smiled and let her mind slip into planning gear. "I'll take the gun we have, just in case..." 

"We can guard your back with the swords!" Jodi said, and hurried to get them from the desk. 

"You'll need shoes," Nancy said, noting Kylie's bare feet, already battered from the initial attack. "You can have mine..." 

Kylie gave her a look. Nancy was a half a foot taller than she was and the two determined long ago they'd never be sharing clothes. 

"You can have the long one," Jodi said, returning with the swords and handing Nancy the bigger one. 

Kylie and Nancy looked down at Jodi's sneaker-clad feet. "Those should work," Kylie said. 

"What?" Jodi asked, bewildered. 

"Give her your shoes," Nancy explained. 

Jodi glanced down at her sneakers, over to Kylie's bare feet, and to Nancy's much larger boots. "Oh!" she quickly slipped off her shoes and the women made the exchange. 

As Kylie slipped on the shoes, she caught sight of Jodi just lowering the blade she held to her shoulder to rest it there. She shot out a hand to stop her. "Jodi," she said carefully, "That blade is sharper than a scalpel." 

Jodi ducked away from the sword that still hovered near her face and held it at a very careful arm's length away. "Why do you keep it so sharp?" Jodi complained. 

"It's supposed to be sharp. And," she continued after glancing out the window, "after this morning, I can see why." 

The three moved to the door and, after a careful survey of the area, eased the door open. 

"There are even less than before," Jodi whispered, watching the three creatures wandering around the water tower. "Maybe they'll all just go away." 

"Maybe they will," Kylie whispered back, "but I'd rather be ready for them in case they don't." She stepped outside and scanned the terrain for any obstacles she would need to avoid. There was a slight depression in the ground directly between the door and the jeep. She decided to detour around that to avoid possibly tripping. Other than that, it seemed a smooth shot. 

She pulled the revolver out of her waistband and glanced at Jodi and Nancy. They nodded their readiness and she took a deep breath. 

Kylie took off, heading just slightly to the right, at an angle that would take her around the edge of the hole, but not too wide. Just as she got beside the hole, about halfway to the jeep, she glanced up at the heavy clacking she heard from across the street. One of the beetles, hidden in the shade beside Chang's, had spotted her. It started toward her, clacking its pincers angrily, alerting the other creatures to her movement. She poured on a burst of speed, all her attention on reaching the tour jeep in time. 

Suddenly, the ground gave way beneath her feet and she felt herself falling. 

She fumbled for purchase on the suddenly loose sand as she slid into what had abruptly become a very large hole. She desperately held onto the gun while digging fingers into the loose dirt, trying to pull herself out. An ominous clacking came from too near her feet. She spun. A set of pincers protruded from the bottom of the hole, which her feet were approaching far too quickly. 

She screamed. 

Kylie pulled her feet away and brought up the gun, firing two wild shots toward the pincers. Their only effect was to bring the beetle up out of the hole after her. She fired another shot, which bounced off the beetle's shell but didn't slow it down. 

Scrambling for her life, she turned and dug both hands and feet into the dirt, and scrambled for level ground. A glance behind her proved she'd never make it in time. 

Then Nancy was there, reaching toward her. 

Kylie grabbed her arms and the older woman pulled. Kylie dug in with her feet, giving her a boost. Their combined efforts pulled Kylie out of the hole and sent them both sprawling at the edge. 

The creature eagerly pursued them, forcing Kylie to roll away, dragging Nancy with her. As they came to a halt, she saw the creature emerge from the pit while Jodi jabbed uselessly at it with the shoto blade. She quickly aimed and fired, sending the beast back into its own hole. 

Nancy got to her feet, dragging Kylie with her, and the three stumbled toward the garage and safety, the creatures from across the street not far behind. They reached the door and hurried through it, slamming it just as the first of the beetles reached it. 

Kylie threw herself down on the couch while Nancy and Jodi leaned against the door. 

"That was," Nancy panted, "productive." 

Kylie glanced at her and grimaced. "And now we're _completely_ out of ammo." 

Nancy frowned. "You're definitely spending too much time with Burt." 


	4. Part 4

**Girls' Night Out - Perfection-Style**  
**by Shadoe Masters**

Burt pulled into the front parking lot at Los Rastros, formerly a military training base, where the shooting match would be held. He slid out of the truck and surveyed the compound for any changes since last year's match. Rows of barracks were off to the right with a chow hall and common building next to them, in the center of the compound. A structure housing the command center sat on the other side, with some office areas beyond that. Behind them all were several quonset huts that had probably been used for training classes in the past. If he remembered correctly - and he was sure he did - the trail to the shooting range was beyond those. 

He turned to the truck and reached into the back to grab the first of his gear. He hesitated as his hand crossed the pack holding the satellite com link. 

He wondered if she was in his bunker yet. He could picture her sitting on the stool, bent over the satellite link, twisting to type in a rapid sequence on the keyboard. His mind brought up many such images from the countless evenings they'd spent there working on projects together. 

A quick glance at his watch revealed it to be nearly 1100 hours. She'd be heading to Chang's, no doubt, taking a break for lunch with Nancy and Jodi. She wouldn't eat in the bunker. 

But it would only take but a moment to check... 

He pulled the pack loose and set it on the edge of the truck, all the while telling himself he was sure she wasn't there. Some other voice inside him told him to call, and call _now_. 

The first voice told him what nonsense that was. 

He tugged at the zipper anyway. 

"Burt Gummer!" came a voice from behind. 

He turned. "Hal Sanger," he said by way of a greeting, and held out a hand. 

Hal smiled as the two shook hands. "I suppose now that you're here the rest of us can just give up." 

"I suppose you can," Burt replied. Honestly, he thought. 

Hal grinned. "A few of us were just heading out for lunch before the match starts. Let's get your gear stowed and you can tag along." 

Burt nodded his reply and zipped the pack shut. Foolish idea, anyway. 

"There goes another one," Jodi pointed out. She'd given up talking and spent the last half hour staring out the garage's side window, watching the beetle activity while the other two women continued pacing and discussing their options - their _lack_ of options. 

Nancy joined her at the window. She followed the direction of her gaze and watched as another beetle found a spot it apparently liked beside the gas pump across the street and started circling, backwards, spreading dirt as it descended into the ground. 

Now that they understood their methods, the nests they had scattered throughout town were obvious; just a slight depression surrounded by loose sand. 

"Look at that one," Nancy said, pointing toward the water tower across the street. While they watched, one of the creatures, still searching for just the right spot to nest, wandered too close to a nest another had already built. It stumbled and slipped down the hole. 

It didn't climb back out. 

"They're traps," Kylie said, coming up behind them. 

"And they're all over town," Nancy added, horrified. 

"We've got to get out of here," Jodi said. "We're not even sure where they are anymore. They could have built one of those nests - those taps - right outside the door!" 

The three women looked carefully at the ground surrounding the door. Besides the hole Kylie had already fallen into - which was now inhabited by a creature that had devoured the original; the one Kylie had killed - they saw another smooth depression at the front of main part of the garage. They could be all around, though. They'd never know until they fell into one. 

"We're stuck here," Kylie said hopelessly. "We don't even dare light a signal fire." 

"Let's not give up," Nancy said. She turned to Kylie. "Hasn't Burt taught you anything that might be useful here?" 

Kylie brightened. "He's taught me all kinds of stuff. Projectiles, bombs, fire... I could probably make a bomb out of... Oh, this beer bottle!" 

Nancy frowned. "Has he taught you to make anything that doesn't kill things?" 

"Well, I could put together a machine to find something to kill. But, mostly," Kylie admitted with a grin, "no." 

"Okay," Nancy said, "let's look around this pile of junk and see what we can find to get us out of here." 

Burt stepped into his room in the barracks, his face preoccupied. He had a some time before the match started. Time enough to check the link, if he hurried. He was sure he'd find that Kylie had set it up by now and he'd be able to stop worrying. 

He quickly set up the link on the table next to his bed. Nothing. Either it wasn't working - doubtful - or she hadn't set it up yet. He told himself that Kylie had, most likely, taken advantage of his absence to slip back into bed for more sleep. That nagging little voice that had been at him since last night, though, reminded him that she knew he was expecting him to check this link and she'd have it ready. He checked his watch. She probably didn't start until after lunch. She just hasn't got it set up correctly yet. 

He knew he should have gone over it with her once more. 

Someone banged on the door. "Ready to lose one, Gummer?" 

Burt almost rolled his eyes before getting up to open the door. It was Hal again. "I beat you last year," Burt pointed out. "I'll beat you this year too." 

Hal smiled. "Wait'll you see what I'm packing this year," he said. "What you got?" 

Burt reached for his .375 H&H Mag and Hal chuckled. He started down the hall toward the back door, on his way to the range. With one last glance toward the linkup, Burt closed the door and followed him. 


	5. Part 5

**Girls' Night Out - Perfection-Style**  
**by Shadoe Masters**

"Hey, what about this?" Jodi said. She held up an old hose sprayer attached to a length of pipe. The other women looked at her blankly. "We could make a.... flamethrower, maybe?" 

Nancy and Kylie exchanged a glance. 

"You're right," Jodi said. "That'd never work." She set it down and continued rummaging through the scattered debris beneath the workbench. "Here's some more bottles." She brought three more empty beer bottles to the center of the garage and set them down on the floor with the rest. "Does he leave them everywhere?" 

"Apparently," Kylie said, setting down the five she carried. "Have you not introduced him to the wonders of a trash bin?" 

"I will when he gets back," Jodi said, her voice determined. 

"Well, what've we got?" Nancy said, setting down two full gas cans next to the growing pile. 

"A lot of junk," Kylie said. 

"And almost three cases of beer bottles," Jodi added. 

"I found a first aid kit," Nancy said, indicating the box she'd set on the floor near the front door. 

"In case one of those monsters gnaws one of our legs off, we'll have a band-aid ready?" Kylie asked. 

"Exactly," Nancy replied. "And, one of the survival kits Burt put together for us." She added that to the pile as well. "That should come in handy." 

"You want to tell us why we've been gathering up all these bottles?" Jodi asked. 

"I think I know," Kylie said with a smile. 

Nancy nodded. "Let me introduce you to Molotov cocktails." She grabbed a bottle and a can of 10-W30 motor oil. "Fill it a little with--" 

"What's that?" Kylie said, crossing to the side window. 

"What?" Nancy said, following her. 

"I hear music," Kylie replied. 

"I don't see anything," Nancy said. 

"I hear it too!" Jodi said. "It's getting louder." 

"Has to be Rosalita," Nancy said, as she also hear the music. "She always plays her radio that loud." 

Kylie went to the door and opened it, after taking a cautious glance around. "I'll signal her. She can drive us all right out of here." 

Rosalita's light blue Mustang came into view around the corner of Nancy's house. Kylie waved her arms, but Rosalita showed no signs of seeing her. Nancy and Jodi joined her at the window and shouted. All to no avail; the car's radio was too loud. 

Something must have caught her eye, though, because she looked toward them and sent them a cheery wave as she pulled off the road, aiming for the gas pump. 

"Oh my gosh!" Jodi cried. "Isn't one of those traps right there?" 

"Yeah," Kylie said, signaling Rosalita to back off. 

But Rosalita didn't figure out Kylie's warning in time. Just as a puzzled frown crossed her face at their strange behavior, the front of her car plunged down into a hole in front of the gas pump. 

She screamed and slammed on the brakes, then shifted the car into reverse. It was too late. The back wheels were already off the ground. 

"Here," Kylie said, thrusting the shorter of the two swords at Nancy. She'd dashed back to Tyler's desk for the swords as soon as Rosalita's car started to tip into the hole. Now she led Nancy across the street, carefully testing the ground for holes as they went. 

Rosalita was already out of her car, trying to simultaneously climb out of the loose sand her car had fallen into and dodge one of the beetles that had hurried over as her car approached the pump. 

Then Kylie was there, swinging the daito at the creature's back legs, severing them instantly. "Hurry!" she shouted. 

Rosalita didn't waste time. She scrambled away from the loose sand and got behind Kylie. 

While Nancy jabbed at it, Kylie hacked off another of its legs, then swung around to slash it through the middle of its vulnerable underside as it toppled sideways. 

Nancy dragged a stunned Rosalita back toward Tyler's garage, but Kylie hesitated. "Kylie! Come on!" 

Kylie was examining the ground between the pump and the store's front porch. "We could make it!" she shouted. 

Then there were three more creatures - two from one side of the store, and another that had dug his way out of the hole at the other side. For another heartbeat, Kylie hesitated. 

Then the creature who'd been in the hole under Rosalita's Mustang crawled out from under the car. 

"Oh shit!" she cried, and dashed after the other two. 

Jodi held the door open while the three hurried to outrun the trailing monsters. 

"_Madre del Dios!_" Rosalita shouted after Jodi had slammed the door between them and the monsters. "What the hell are those things?" 

"Something Mixmaster dreamed up, no doubt," Nancy said. 

"Where's your radio?" Kylie asked. 

"On the passenger seat, in my car," Rosalita said. 

"Great," Jodi commented. 

"Back to Plan A," Nancy said. She turned toward the pile of junk in the middle of the garage. Jodi and Kylie followed with Rosalita trailing behind. 

"What's Plan A?" Rosalita asked. "We have a plan?" 

A short while later, the women had assembled a neat case of beer bottles filled with an incendiary mixture of gas and motor oil, and topped off by loose rags from around the garage. 

"Just light and throw," Nancy explained, getting to her feet. 

"For a pacifist, you sure know a lot about bombs," Rosalita said, helping Kylie carry the case toward the sliding doors at the front of the building. 

"Radical friends," Nancy explained with a reminiscent smile. 

"I think I've got their pattern figured out," Jodi called from the side door. She'd been keeping watch from the window. 

"They have a pattern?" Kylie asked as they carefully set the box down then joined her at the window. 

Jodi nodded. "It's the traffic lanes. "If you know what to look for, you can see their traps. Now look where they all are." While the other three examined the ground, Jodi explained. "In front of the store and beside it, where everyone parks, next to the gas pump, where Tyler usually parks the tour jeep, even the path where you guys usually cross the street to get to the store." 

Sure enough, the highest concentration of traps were where people usually walked. 

"They have some way of sensing this," Kylie said. "Great." 

"Let's get rid of them," Nancy said. 

All four went to the main garage doors and got ready. "Who's got a lighter?" Nancy asked. From the expressions that passed around the circle, that was the one tiny detail they hadn't thought of. 

"I know!" Jodi quickly went to the barrel she'd dragged up next to the desk where she'd thrown out the trash and other items she decided Tyler didn't need to keep. She dug through the contents for a moment then emerged and hurried back over to the door. "Here," she said, handing a red lighter to Nancy - who grinned at the naked woman on it. 

Kylie and Rosalita picked up a bottle each while Jodi slid the doors open. "This is making an awful lot of noise," she said. 

"It's all right. We _want_ them to hear us this time," Kylie reminded her. "The closer they are, the more we'll hit." 

"Just be sure you don't hit the gas pumps," Jodi reminded them. "Or the store!" 

"And be sure to throw them as soon as they're lit," Nancy added. 

"Gotcha," Rosalita said. "Here they come!" 

Kylie and Rosalita stepped out onto the small lip of cement that made the ramp into the garage. Nancy lit Rosalita's bottle, then Kylie's, and both women threw their bottles at the advancing creatures while they were still across the street. 

With a loud _whoosh_, the bottles exploded, both missing their first targets, but one landed close enough to set the creature afire. It writhed and shook, but eventually fell and died. 

"Oh _yeah_!" Kylie shouted, reaching into the garage for another bottle. 

"This is really going to work!" Jodi said, handing up bottles to both Rosalita and Kylie. 

Nancy lit the makeshift fuses again and the two younger women threw them, this time both hitting their targets. By the time those hit, they were ready with two more. One direct hit this time, the oil in the firebomb coating the creature's thick upper shell and spreading the fire in a thick layer across it's back. The beetle did the unexpected, however. 

Diving quickly for the hole in front of it, it vibrated itself underground and put out the flame, then emerged to continue the advance. The next two creatures did the same. Then the creatures were too close, so the women ducked back into the garage and slammed the doors shut. 

"Did you see that?" Kylie shouted. "Did you _see_ that? The damn thing survived a firebomb!" 

"What are we going to do now?" Jodi asked, the fear plain on her face. 

"This is crazy," Rosalita added. "How are we going to get out of here if they can put _out_ our weapons?" 

"We'll think of something," Nancy said, ever the calm, mother figure. The worry on her face belied that calm, though. 

"So we're stuck here indefinitely," Rosalita complained. 

"Only until Burt comes back and calls us a 'bunch of girls'," Kylie pointed out gloomily. 

"I think what Burt will call us is the _least_ of our worries," Nancy reminded her. 

"Well," Jodi said, heading toward the back of the garage, "at least Tyler finally fixed the plumbing." She went into the tiny bathroom behind the "office" area, but had only been in there a moment when they heard, "_Aaarrgh!_" 

All three women ran to the rescue, but Jodi's face showed only aggravation - not the terror they'd expected - when she came out. 

"There's no toilet paper!" she complained. 

"Just like a man," Rosalita said with a smirk. 

"Here, use this," Nancy said, holding up a newspaper she'd found next to Tyler's desk. 

"I don't think so," Jodi replied. She looked around then picked up one of Tyler's shirts she'd dug out from under the couch and headed back to the bathroom. 

That lifted their spirits. 

"Okay, look..." Kylie began, as she paced around the garage, examining the pile of parts they'd already assembled, as well as the piles and piles of junk everywhere. "We've got to have another option. We have a _ton_ of possible weapons in this building. We've just got to... do what we can with what we've got." 

Nancy shook her head. "You sound more like Burt every day." 

Kylie grinned. "And as soon as I come up with a Burt-inspired plan, you'll be glad I do." 

Burt stepped into his room, a markedly grim expression on his normally serious face. He set a trophy on the dresser just inside the door and promptly forgot about it as he crossed the room to the com link set up next to the bed. He flipped it on to check the signal, but got back nothing. 

"Almost 1500 hours," he muttered, checking his watch. She would have set it up by now. Kylie was a little too... casual toward procedure, true, but she never just ignored her responsibilities. She knew he was waiting for her to set that up so he could test the system. 

So why wasn't it set up? 

It could be just a malfunction, nothing to worry about. 

But it had worked fine in the valley. There was no reason for it to malfunction. 

She could have set it up wrong. He'd _tried_ to go over it with her... 

He frowned. No, Kylie _knew_ that system. He had to admit that. 

So what was going on? 

For the first time, Burt wished for cell-phone towers in the valley. He had a very bad feeling about this. Something was definitely wrong. Very wrong. 

Or the satellite just wasn't working. 

He was out of his room and locking the door before he knew it. There was a pay phone at the end of the hall. He took a chance and called Chang's. The lines were still down. 

Shaking his head, he dialed Twitchell's number. Maybe he'd stayed home this week after all. Or maybe his wife, Lisa, could just go check... 

But there was no answer there, either. 

He considered calling Sam, but hesitated. The sheriff had already started ribbing him about his "infatuation" for the much-younger Kylie. He didn't want to add any fuel to that fire. 

Still, it wouldn't hurt to have him check in on the girls while he and Tyler were gone. 

"Ready for round two, Gummer?" 

Jim Duckett clapped him on the back, his friendly smile intruding on Burt's deliberations. 

He turned, shifting his mind back to the match, and checked his watch. "Is it time already?" 

"Yup," Jim told him. "You showed 'em old Gummer hasn't lost his touch in the easy rounds. Let's see what you've got for the big boys." 

"I think I can show you a thing or two," Burt said. He scooped his quarters out of the phone and slipped them back in his pocket. 

Kylie was right, he thought. He worried too much. She was armed and capable, and if anything had happened, she'd've called him here from the bunker. She had the number. 

This was the first vacation he'd had in months. He intended to enjoy himself. He needed to just stop thinking about that woman for a few days. He'd be fine. 

"Let me just pick up my rifle," he told Jim with a feral grin. 


	6. Part 6

**Girls' Night Out - Perfection-Style**  
**by Shadoe Masters**

"Stop!" Nancy whispered, grabbing Kylie's arm to draw her to a halt. Nancy's wrist seismo went off but Kylie hadn't had a chance to put hers on that morning. 

They'd just opened the doors and were getting ready for their second assault on the creatures when El Blanco arrived. They were safe, protected by the garage's thick cement floor, but they didn't want to attract the graboid's attention. The women froze, waiting for the giant worm to pass through town. 

But he didn't. 

It circled, then suddenly burst from the ground, just north of the town's water tower, one of the underground beetles in his jaw. 

The women exchanged smiles. 

The graboid ate slowly, waving back and forth as he devoured the creature bite by bite. 

"You know," Kylie whispered, "now that I can see it in the full light of day, it looks like a giant limp dick." 

Nancy put her forehead in her hand and shook her head while Rosalita giggled. 

Kylie turns to the older woman. "But it does! See?" 

"No," said Nancy. She put her hands over her ears. 

"It does," Kylie muttered to Jodi. 

Jodi considered, watching as El Blanco slowly slipped into the ground. "I never noticed that before," she said at last, "but I think you're right. 

Nancy rolled her eyes. "Don't you start too." 

While they watched and waited silently, the graboid circled under the town. Then a puff of dust came from the front of Chang's as El Blanco devoured another of the monsters. He didn't bother surfacing for this one, just continued on to the next, just beyond the pile of rusted out construction equipment next to Tyler's garage. They could track the giant worm by following the clouds of airborne dirt it left behind while eating. 

The women exchanged a smile. "Maybe El Blanco will take care of our problem for us," Rosalita suggested. 

"We can hope," Nancy replied. 

But El Blanco wasn't very hungry that day. He finished one more and disappeared as suddenly as he'd arrived. 

"Back to the firebombs," Jodi said. 

"Why?" Rosalita said. "They're not doing any good." 

"They could," Nancy said, considering. "Their shell is tough, but the underside seems vulnerable. If you could hit them all, say, right at their feet." 

Kylie raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Have you seen us throw? We're not all that accurate as it is." 

"I know it's not the best plan," Nancy replied," but right now it's all we've got. 

"Wait..." Kylie said, a thoughtful frown on her face. "I've got an idea..." Kylie went back to their pile of supplies. She didn't find what she was looking for there, but something in Burt's survival kit caught her attention, and a box of nails from one of the tables lining the walls completed her search. 

"I think we've got a gun," she announced. 

"A gun?" Rosalita said. "There's a gun in the first aid kit?" 

"No," Kylie explained. "I just remembered some things Burt was telling me once, and, added to our firebombs, I think we have a plan." 

"And this plan is...?" Nancy wanted to know. 

Kylie grinned. "The firebombs just need an upgrade. That's what these are for." She held up a vial and the box of nails. "These," she said, indicating the vial, "are chlorine tablets. Useful for sterilizing water, but, mixed with the gasoline, they become highly explosive." 

"And the nails?" Jodi prompted. 

"Bullets!" Kylie explained. "All you need for a gun is a projectile and some kind of explosive charge to fire it with. We have an explosive charge, and we have a projectile! With a slight modification to our current system, we don't have to worry about a direct hit." 

"I still don't get it," Rosalita said. 

But Nancy was nodding. "I think I do. Let's get to work." 

Quickly, they gathered the firebombs they'd already made and took out the rags. "We'll need some clean rags to keep the gas away from the chlorine," Kylie said. "They'll explode once the two mix - and we don't want that happening until they're far away from _us_." 

They looked around. Most of the rags they'd found were already soaked with gas, oil, and dirt. 

Jodi smirked. "I've got just the thing." She went to Tyler's couch and gathered up an armful of dirty t-shirts. 

"He's going to kill you when he gets back," Kylie said, taking one and tearing it into small rags. 

"He won't have as much to clean up," Jodi replied, her voice saccharine-sweet. "I'm doing him a favor." 

"Besides," Rosalita added, "we are in danger. We must protect ourselves. We have to do what we can--" 

"--with what we've got," they all finished in unison. 

They dropped a small handful of nails into each bottle and stuffed the necks with the torn t-shirt material, then carried them all toward the doors. 

"We'll have to be quick," Kylie warned them. "Throw and duck. The farther they are away, the better." 

The other women nodded, and once they were ready, they opened the doors. 

Several of the beetles were milling around in front of Chang's, probably trying to figure out what had happened to their fellows that El Blanco had gotten. They heard the doors slide open, though, and started scurrying toward the garage. 

Kylie and Rosalita waited, bottle poised in one hand, chlorine tablet in the other, ready for just the right moment. 

"Now," Kylie said. 

Each stuffed a tablet into their bottle and threw, then Nancy and Jodi slammed the doors as they dove back inside. 

There were two loud explosions and suddenly the metal walls of the garage rang as the nails slammed into them. The window in one of the doors shattered, raining shards of broken glass over them as they ducked away, suddenly hoping the shelter of the metal walls would be enough. 

When the rain of nails stopped, Nancy looked out the broken window. "I think we did it!" she cried. 

The women crowded around to see, Kylie picking her way very carefully through the glass with her bare feet. 

In the street, where there had once been four very dangerous creatures, now held only shredded and bloody remains. 

"Now we just lure the rest of them out," Kylie said. 

Making as much noise as possible, they slid the garage doors open twice more, tossing their new explosives with deadly accuracy. 

"How are we going to know when we've got them all?" Jodi asked as they regrouped between attacks. 

"I suppose we could poke a stick into those holes," Nancy suggested. 

"Then what?" Kylie asked. "Run if a monster comes out?" 

On their next attack, Rosalita's bottle didn't travel quite far enough, and rolled into the depression directly in front of the garage. They waited, but it didn't explode. Cautiously, they gathered around the window to investigate. 

"It's gone!" Rosalita said. "Where'd it go?" 

"Maybe the--" Jodi began. 

Her voice was drowned out by a muffled explosion nearby. Sand and creature body parts flew in the air as they dove for cover. 

"What the hell was that?" Rosalita demanded. 

"It ate our bomb!" Kylie cried with a grin. 

"Why don't we roll those bombs in all the traps?" Nancy suggested eagerly. 

"Exactly what I was thinking," Kylie replied. "At least as far as Jodi's truck. If we could get that far, we could drive out of here." 

"_How_ are we going to get the bombs into those traps all the way across the street?" Rosalita asked suspiciously. 

"We'll... have to go over there, of course," Kylie said. 

"I'm not going out there!" Jodi cried. 

"No, no, no," Rosalita insisted. "No way. How are we going to protect ourselves from all the flying nails?" 

"Hmmm... Good point," Kylie said, looking around the garage. "We're going to need a... shield of some type..." 

The women started looking around the garage for useful materials. 

"What about this table?" Rosalita asked, standing before one of the workbenches that ringed the main part of the garage. "The wood is about two inches thick. Is that enough?" 

Nancy and Kylie exchanged a glance. "You're the expert on this," Kylie said. 

"It should work better than the garage walls," Nancy said. 

"And if the explosion happens inside the hole, the nails should go straight up," Kylie added. 

"'Should' being the operative word here," Jodi pointed out. 

"I don't see how we've got much choice," Nancy said. "It's either battle those things out there or stay trapped in here until someone notices we're missing. That's at least until Tuesday when the phone lines get repaired." 

Unhappily, they all agreed. 

"Okay kids, we need a plan," Nancy said, already crossing the room to gather up materials. "We have to figure out who moves the table, who throws the bombs--" 

"And how to haul all these gas-filled beer bottles," Jodi finished. 

In the end, they rigged up a sled from an abandoned car hood and a series of fan belts discarded among the rubble in the garage. Nancy and Rosalita took up stations moving the table, while Jodi pulled the sled of beer bottles along behind. The swords they kept on the sled, just in case. Wearing an old pair of Tyler's boots with leftover shredded t-shirt stuffed in the toes, Kylie was assigned to throwing bottles. 

They quickly developed a rhythm: Slowly creep up on a trap, hide safely behind the table shield, wait for Kylie to drop a chlorine tablet into the bottle and hurl it as hard as she dared into the trap, ducking back behind table just in time, then wait for the explosion 

It took less than half an hour to clean out the area around the garage. And only once did they have to deal with monsters outside their traps. But with a bit of cooperation in quickly moving the heavy shield, they managed to take those out too. 

They also took out the side of the tour jeep. 

"Tyler's going to be mad," Jodi commented as they surveyed the holes the most recent nailbomb had made in his tires and most of the side. 

Kylie didn't waste time worrying about Tyler, though. She jumped into truck and pounced on the glove compartment. "Yes!" she shouted, pulling out Tyler's revolver. "_And_ a full box of bullets!" 

She found it none too soon, though. The beetles who'd taken up residence around Nancy's were attracted by the noise and commotion. They headed eagerly toward the women. 

"Not this time!" Kylie shouted, taking aim. Straddling the two front seats, she got three of them, then realized the futility of trying to get them all. "Get the shield ready!" 

The others were way ahead of her. It was in place, and by the time she'd scrambled out of the jeep, Jodi was handing her a bottle. Two well-aimed missiles took care of the advancing creatures. 

And the tour jeep. Now both sides were riddled with holes. 

"So far, so good, though," Rosalita pointed out. The area was clear around the garage, and they could concentrate on the area around Chang's. 

Navigating around empty traps, nails, and monster body parts, they moved quickly across the street and concentrated their efforts where they could do the most damage. 

"Why aren't they coming out?" Jodi wondered, after they'd finished clearing the traps in front of the store and started moving toward the water tower, where Jodi's truck was parked. 

"Maybe they're scared," Rosalita suggested. 

"Or, maybe they're daylight creatures," Nancy said. "It's getting dark." 

"And we need to hurry," Kylie said. "It's getting harder to figure out where the traps are. If this table falls in one, we'd never get it back out." 

Spurred to activity, they crept up on the next trap, tossed a bomb, and ducked the flying debris and body parts. The next one wasn't far. Kylie threw the bomb, they ducked, and nails flew. 

"No body parts," Rosalita commented. 

"Must have been a dud," Kylie said. "Let's try that one." 

The next one rained a satisfying amount of viscera on their shield. 

"Aim for Jodi's truck," Nancy said, as they maneuvered the shield toward the store. "If we can get that far, we can get out of town." 

"And hurry," Jodi said, as they shouldered the heavy table around. "We've got incoming!" 

A half dozen of the creatures had spotted them and were coming their way from behind the store. 

Once the shield was in place, Kylie let fly another missile into the midst of the creatures. Amid the very satisfying sound of nails puncturing hardened beetle shell, came the sound of glass breaking - and the whoosh of tires going abruptly flat. 

"Uh-oh," Rosalita whispered. 

They slowly peered around the shield, but they already knew what they'd find. 

The near side tires on Jodi's red truck were both flat. 

"I don't suppose you have two spares," Kylie asked. 

"We wouldn't have time to change them if she did," Nancy said. "Not with all these beetles around." 

Kylie looked longingly toward Nancy's house. "I suppose it's too late to change our plan and go for my Rover." 

Nancy shook her head. "Too far into 'enemy territory,' and we're getting low on bottles." 

"Then we'll get in the store and call for help," Rosalita said firmly. 

Kylie nodded. "Jodi's got plenty of ammo in there. We could hold them off long enough." 

Within an hour, they'd circled around Chang's, cleaning out traps as they went. 

"We're almost out of bottles," Jodi informed them, after their latest success. "Only three more." 

"And it's almost completely dark," Nancy added. 

"Still a lot more traps," Kylie said with a sigh. 

"I don't think we can do this all tonight," Nancy said. "At least we've cleared a path for whoever rescues us. 

"Let's go call for help," Jodi said. 

They started for the store, leaving their makeshift shield in place. But the job wasn't quite finished. 

"Wait a minute!" Rosalita cried. "Look over there." 

"Over there" was the wide open space between the store and Larry's trailer at the edge of town. There were perhaps half a dozen of the creatures. All headed their way. 

"And look over at Nancy's," Jodi added. At least a dozen more. 

"We've got to take those out," Kylie said. "If we don't, we'll never get enough time to secure the store before they attack. 

"We've only got three bottles," Nancy said. 

"Then we'll have to make them count." Kylie thought for a moment. "Look, if we break the bottles on the road between the two groups, that should get most of them. I can finish off what's left, as long as we don't get any new ones." 

"We'll have to get them soon, so you'll have time," Nancy said. 

"Throw them all at once," Rosalita said. "But hurry." 

Kylie, Rosalita, and Nancy each took a bottle. "On the count of three," Kylie said. "And throw them high - give us a chance to duck." Everyone nodded. "Okay, one, two, three--" 

The bottles arched up and out, and the women ducked out of sight. 

"Hey," Jodi said, "what's that n--" 

The bottles shattered on the pavement, exploding and sending nails and glass shards in every direction. Kylie got ready to aim for the survivors when they heard a most welcome sound. 

Three hours on the road, and Burt was still telling himself he was a fool. He'd found nothing in the valley to indicate a disaster of any kind, and as he pulled around the tree line and saw the welcome lights of town, his first glance told him nothing had changed from that morning when he'd left. 

Then something high in the air caught his eye. "What the hell?" he muttered under his breath. 

He realized what they meant just seconds before they hit the pavement. He swerved off the road, throwing himself into the dubious protection of his truck body. 

Three explosions rocked the street where he would have been, followed quickly by a rapid volley of something - not bullets, something smaller - slamming into the sides of his truck. He was thankful his reflexes told him to duck. He reached behind the seat for his rifle. He didn't know what he was up against, but he was sure he'd need the rifle to fight it. When everything was quiet, he cautiously poked his head up to assess the situation. 

He came face-to-face with a giant set of pincers. 

They clacked once where his head had been, giving him all the justification he needed to fire. He put a bullet in the first one and the one that followed, turning the weapon to full auto to finish off the creatures who'd been shielded from the blast - obviously meant for them - by his truck. There were a few more heading for Chang's Market. He followed and finished them off, then surveyed the town, looking for more targets. 

Kylie was running awkwardly toward him, half-dressed and wearing what looked like Tyler's boots. "No!" she shouted. "Stay on the pavement! They've made--" 

The ground suddenly gave out from underneath him and he fell, going down into what looked like an enormous pit with something _moving_ at the bottom. He twisted and fired three quick shots into whatever was at the bottom of the pit. It stopped moving. 

Then Kylie was reaching in to haul him out of the pit. 

He got to his feet and she was there, throwing herself into his arms. He clung just as tightly to her. 

When Kylie pulled away, he reluctantly let her go, his face a mask of concern. "What--" 

She smacked his shoulder. "What took you so long? I thought you were never going to rescue me!" 

Stunned and still very much confused, Burt took a good look around the town, noting the damage in the dim light. Holes peppered vehicles and buildings, a very out of place workbench stood in the middle of the street, and the three other women of the town all had a battered, exhausted look. He realized his hands were still encircling Kylie's bare waist. 

He thrust her away. "Just... go put some clothes on..." he muttered. 

Kylie smiled. "You are so predictable, Burt," she said, then stretched up to plant a quick kiss on his cheek. "That's what I was _trying_ to do when we were attacked this morning!" 

"I _knew_ something would go wrong. Didn't I tell you--" 

"It's not our fault, Burt," Nancy said, just now reaching the pair. "We didn't plan all this." 

"We were doing all right by ourselves, Burt Gummer," Rosalita added. "If you hadn't arrived, we'd be just fine." 

"Fine? You call this fine?" Burt retorted. 

"Well, we would have..." 

Kylie took a moment to stand next to Jodi and watch the fighting. 

"At least everything's back to normal," Jodi said. 

Kylie nodded. Then she grinned at the scold Burt was getting from Nancy. He wouldn't put up with it long, she figured. As a matter of fact, probably right about now... "Three, two, one..." 

Burt turned to her, his face a mask of desperation. "Are you going to get dressed so we can take care of these... _beetles_ or am I on this one alone?" 

Kylie allowed herself one short gurgle of laughter before turning to Jodi. "Can I borrow some clothes?" She looked down. "And shoes?" Jodi nodded and they headed back toward the store. "And I'll need a gun, Burt. My Kimber's trapped in 'enemy territory'." Burt took the opportunity to escape before Nancy could start up again. "I've got work to do," he said, and headed for his truck. 

Nancy watched Burt gathering weapons and ammo out of his truck after changing into his tactical vest. "_Now_ everything's back to normal," she said. 

END


End file.
